Mom’s dementia recently plummeted into what seems a new phase, and I was overwhelmed. She no longer communicates adequately, she is forgetting how to walk, sense bathroom needs, etc. Eating and taking medicine is still doable, but in the progression, these skills will also decline. Mom hums hymns and what appears to be songs she makes up. It’s easy to feel devastated by these changes and miss the moments of great memories.

Mary and Martha reacted to their brother Lazarus’s death similarly. They sent for Jesus when their brother was sick, but he did not come. He came four days later, but it was too late, so they thought.

Many Jews had gathered to mourn the death of Lazarus. His body was already wrapped in grave clothes, and I assume spices and anointments had been applied in the typical cultural custom of the time. After four days, his body would already be decaying. All hope was lost until Jesus came.

Martha ran to meet Jesus, “Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died.”  Jesus responded, “Thy brother shall rise again.” Martha knew Lazarus would arise again, in the resurrection, on the last day. Jesus told her He was the resurrection and the life and if she believed in Him she would never die. Martha professed her belief and called Mary to tell her the Master was in the city to see her.

Mary arose quickly and met her Master. The Jews who had gathered in the house to mourn followed Mary thinking she was going to the gravesite. When Mary saw Jesus she fell at His feet, “lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died.”  Jesus was troubled and wept when He saw Mary and the Jews weeping.

Jesus commanded the stone be moved from Lazarus’ grave much to Martha’s dismay. She proclaimed it had been four days and his body would be stinking from decay. Jesus challenged her to believe and see the glory of God. Jesus prayed to His Father God and commanded, “Lazarus, come forth. Loose him, and let him go.”

Like Mary and Martha, I can run to Jesus weeping with my “ifs”. My tears are seen by my Master who is moved with compassion. I rest assured that Mom will live again because she has believed. I’m not sure how many days, weeks, months, or years dementia will last, but I’m assured Jesus will take Mom home right on time.

I’m thankful for God’s word and for friends who send comforting reminders to enjoy Mom’s humming, to rest in the fact that she’s communing with God, and to soak up the memories as blessings. This long goodbye is painful but necessary for Mom to fall asleep until that great resurrection day when she shall rise from the grave to receive her glorified body. Someday, Mom will no longer experience pain, sorrow, sadness, or sickness. She will live eternally with her Savior Jesus Christ “loosed” from death to live with Jesus forevermore!

Sometimes we need a new perspective.

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.  Revelation 21:4