Mom’s mental capacity had declined. I needed to move her in with me but I resisted. My life was already full. Marriage, ministry, writing, and grandchildren were important and I didn’t see how caring for mom was going to fit. The burden was too much to bear.
Deciding to supervise Mom from home via cameras, taking over her affairs, cooking her meals, paying her bills, etc. was overwhelming. Much time was consumed with several trips a day between my house and hers along with the stress of constant worry. I soon surrendered to full-time care.
Moving mom to my house was a major life adjustment. Our contents had to be downsized and home modifications had to be made. Moving was a job, adjusting was a bigger job, and full surrender to service was the biggest job.
It has taken all of us four months to find a routine and turn what seemed a burden into a blessing. As I experience all mom’s ups and downs my heart is learning to lean into hers. We are sharing life together in ways I never knew possible. Reading her moods, interpreting her needs when she is confused, and understanding her jumbled words while striving to accept our new lifestyle take full surrender to God’s current plan.
This season is not easy but I feel less burdened and more blessed. Caregiving is a blessing to be experienced and treasured. To be chosen to care for my mom is an honor.
Jesus bestowed this honor on John as he and Mary stood at the crowded cross. Mary’s anguish must have been heart-wrenching as she watched Jesus suffer to buy our salvation. Jesus is not recorded as speaking words of comfort but rather words of commission. “Behold thy mother,” Jesus said to John, and “Behold thy son,” He said to Mary.
For the next few years, we read of the other disciple’s ministries without the mention of John. He must have lived a quiet life of serving Mary. We aren’t given any details, but I imagine he made sure she was clothed, fed, and protected until she passed. Serving Jesus by serving Mary was a specific honor known only to John.
What could be greater than the call to serve those who have served us? It’s not a meaningless waste of time to be a caregiver but a sacrificial space of time that will bring lasting rewards.
John was given first, second, and third John. These books teach the love of God for believers and what it means to experience God’s love. I suppose Jesus wanted a man who could truly love his mother to care for her. John also got Revelation; a divine instruction book known by no other disciple. Silently serving brings current and future blessings.
Blessed is that servant, whom his lord when cometh shall find so doing. Matthew 24:46
Your message is beautiful, Lisa, a tribute to your service and to all who are or have been caregivers. The connection you make to John caring for Mary fits perfectly with your message. Thank you for the blessing you’ve shared today.
Thank you Katherine, I’m encouraged by John’s committment to obey Jesus commmand to care for Mary. It was important to Jesus that His mother be cared for by a loving friend. I desire to be like Jesus and He clearly insturcted me to care for Mom while assuring me He would take care of us.
Lisa
I know what you’re doing is hard, and I’m happy to hear you are all adjusting. You are indeed blessed to be serving in this role. Your mom raised a good, godly girl.
Thanks for highlighting the role of John in caring for his mother, Mary.
Thank you Candyace for your encouraging words. Only by the grace of God do I care for Mom! I have drawn a lot of encouragement from Jesus’ command to John to care for Mary.