Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. Proverbs 31:30

My friend Maddy’s grandmother used to tell her to “be pretty” which meant to “behave like a lady.” This sounds old-fashioned or out of date but God’s Word clearly teaches the distinct nature and role of women. Walking in this teaching brings spiritual joy and liberation. 

Scripture can be quite challenging to obey, yet God’s truth stands. I Peter 3:1 instructs we women to be in subjection to our own husbands. In doing so, disobedient husbands may be won by our Godly conversations. Indeed, words of love and admiration for the Lord change the environment of our homes thus influencing our mates. This teaching applies to all Christian women however, it proves challenging for women who live with unsaved or disobedient men. Some husbands do not read and obey the Word of God. Therefore, living this scripture in our homes requires faith in Jesus because it is impossible without Him.

Our words are very important. Projecting words of frustration in the home is of no benefit to anyone. Our words can wound and nag like a continual dripping of rain on the roof. We are instructed to use chaste words that are pure in thought or action. What is inside will come out.

No amount of make-up, hairstyle, jewelry, or clothing can change us inwardly. I do not believe it is sinful to wear such things within reason. What becomes sinful is if we adorn the outward to draw attention to ourselves. Furthermore, we can provoke envy of other women or lust from men other than our husbands. The Bible teaches us to dress modestly for a reason but the focus is on the inward woman.

Clearly, God is concerned about our heart’s condition. He desires we women to have the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which in the sight of God of great price I Peter 3:4b. An ornament is used to enhance beauty; it adds to the attractiveness. A meek or submissive heart will not be overly overt or resentful but rather will know when to keep quiet. Moreover, we will be heard when speaking the truth in love which is required in some situations. A Christian lady’s hidden heart, in the sight of God, is of great price.   

Teaching this text from I Peter 3 would be unbalanced without acknowledging that husbands have a role. They are to dwell with us according to knowledge or get to know and understand us. Husbands are to honor us as the weaker vessels showing respect for our emotional needs. We are to be heirs together of the grace of life; I Peter 3:7b. Ladies, we all know that we are not accountable as to whether our husbands do their part or not. Marriage is challenging and so is this text but God honors obedience to His word.

Being of one mind having compassion for one another will be beneficial to our marriage relationships. Striving to love, being pitiful, and being courteous is biblical. We are not to return evil for evil or railing for railing, on the contrary, we are to be a blessing to inherit a blessing. Ladies, if you are like me I do not always live out this text. We need to surrender to Jesus in order to obey this text. 

WORDS OF TRUTH

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver. Proverbs 25:11

Pleasant words are as a honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones. Proverbs 16:24

A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. Proverbs 27:15

In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety: not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array. I Timothy 2:9