Many have missed their mothers this May. Some have lost their mom to death recently or in previous years. Others may experience estranged relationships or lack closeness to their mothers. Because of these circumstances, Mother’s Day may have brought grief rather than joy for some.

My mother and I didn’t always share a closeness of friendship. Long talks of dreams and plans alluded to our conversations, but our loving bond has lasted nearly six decades.

Growing up as Mom’s daughter consisted of discipline and hardship, but I never felt unloved. Shopping trips, eating out, amusement parks, vacations, camping, etc., weren’t a part of my childhood. Money was scarce, and survival was Mom’s focus. I wore passed-down clothing from family and friends. Laundry mats and ringer washers were how she kept my clothes clean. She kept my siblings and me clean and could make a shack shine.

I don’t remember many hugs, heart-to-heart talks, and pampered living during my childhood, but life was fun. Making mud pies, riding bikes, skipping lemon twists, playing jacks and board games, and reading evoke sweet memories. Mom always won our game of jacks and ensured we made many trips to the library.

Elaborate meals served in fancy dishes were replaced by pinto beans and cornbread served on worn, mismatched plates. Water from our well and Kool-Aid were the drinks of my day. My favorite snack, homemade no-bake cookies, remains a favorite. Imagine how many meals, Kool-Aid, and cookies Mom made during my growing-up years.

My most meaningful memory of Mom was her conversion. Her surrender to Jesus brought joy to all who knew her. I saw Salvation through Mom’s born-again experience in Jesus Christ, so I couldn’t accept any less for my soul. Life was challenging, but Jesus was seen in momma.

My teen years were tough as Mom and Dad’s marriage came to an excruciating end. Dad’s affair and erratic behavior stressed Mom. She returned to factory work, and I learned to cook and clean, helping the best I could. At sixteen, I began waiting tables and often bought food and supplies for our home. Mom confided in me, and I learned heavy truths for a young lady my age, but Mom needed a trusted friend. Mom survived and later thrived as I became a mother.

During my early motherhood, Mom’s concern for my other siblings and grandchildren often preceded our needs, but I understood Mom’s love and worry for other family members. This never caused division as I accepted my standing. My respect and love for Mom were unwavering through these years.

My Mom is still present, but dementia has robbed us of our former mother-daughter relationship. I now serve Mom as she once served me. The days are long, and the load gets heavy. I’d imagine mom experienced many long and difficult days as she navigated a troubled marriage, financial hardship, and limited living. Nevertheless, she lived to serve her family.

To all of you who missed your mother this month, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I miss my mom, too. Grief took hold on Mother’s Day despite my desire to feel otherwise. Let’s reminisce and choose to store meaningful memories of our mothers regardless of present or past circumstances. Honoring our mothers is a biblical teaching that brings a promised blessing.

Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee. Exodus 20:12